Tips from Lorraine Kember to Mesothelioma Caregivers: You Will Survive

Cancer & Caregiving
Reading Time: 2 mins
Publication Date: 12/11/2012
Fact Checked
Our fact-checking process begins with a thorough review of all sources to ensure they are high quality. Then we cross-check the facts with original medical or scientific reports published by those sources, or we validate the facts with reputable news organizations, medical and scientific experts and other health experts. Each page includes all sources for full transparency.
Reviewed

Asbestos.com is the nation’s most trusted mesothelioma resource

The Mesothelioma Center at Asbestos.com has provided patients and their loved ones the most updated and reliable information on mesothelioma and asbestos exposure since 2006.

Our team of Patient Advocates includes a medical doctor, a registered nurse, health services administrators, veterans, VA-accredited Claims Agents, an oncology patient navigator and hospice care expert. Their combined expertise means we help any mesothelioma patient or loved one through every step of their cancer journey.

More than 30 contributors, including mesothelioma doctors, survivors, health care professionals and other experts, have peer-reviewed our website and written unique research-driven articles to ensure you get the highest-quality medical and health information.

About The Mesothelioma Center at Asbestos.com

  • Assisting mesothelioma patients and their loved ones since 2006.
  • Helps more than 50% of mesothelioma patients diagnosed annually in the U.S.
  • A+ rating from the Better Business Bureau.
  • 5-star reviewed mesothelioma and support organization.
Learn More About Us

Testimonials

"My family has only the highest compliment for the assistance and support that we received from The Mesothelioma Center. This is a staff of compassionate and knowledgeable individuals who respect what your family is experiencing and who go the extra mile to make an unfortunate diagnosis less stressful. Information and assistance were provided by The Mesothelioma Center at no cost to our family."
Lashawn
Mesothelioma patient’s daughter
  • Google Review Rating
  • BBB Review Rating

How to Cite Asbestos.com’s Article

APA

Kember, L. (2020, October 16). Tips from Lorraine Kember to Mesothelioma Caregivers: You Will Survive. Asbestos.com. Retrieved October 7, 2022, from https://www.asbestos.com/blog/2012/12/11/tips-from-lorraine-kember/

MLA

Kember, Lorraine. "Tips from Lorraine Kember to Mesothelioma Caregivers: You Will Survive." Asbestos.com, 16 Oct 2020, https://www.asbestos.com/blog/2012/12/11/tips-from-lorraine-kember/.

Chicago

Kember, Lorraine. "Tips from Lorraine Kember to Mesothelioma Caregivers: You Will Survive." Asbestos.com. Last modified October 16, 2020. https://www.asbestos.com/blog/2012/12/11/tips-from-lorraine-kember/.

Undoubtedly, we were mortally wounded. We suffered shock, disbelief, anger, helplessness and utter despair. In fact, we felt all the symptoms of grief one feels when a loved one actually has died.

What makes this disease particularly hard is that the life expectancy after most diagnoses of any form of mesothelioma is shorter than those of most other cancers. Doctors and cancer treatment centers have yet to treat mesothelioma with the same success that they do breast cancer and many other cancers.

Never Fear the Unknown

What also makes such a diagnosis difficult to deal with as a family — as a wife — is the unknown. Because successful treatments followed by long-term survivals are so rare, it’s hard to know when you make good caregiver decisions. And it can be hard for the patient to know when he makes sound decisions about his own treatment.

With no way of knowing how long Brian would survive, I saw every symptom he experienced as an indication of his impending death. I felt tightness in my chest, often became short of breath and groaned involuntarily.

Man Looking Into the Sunset

I wished there was someone I could talk to, but I had nowhere to turn. My children were trying to come to terms with their own grief and it upset them if I made any mention of their father’s deterioration.

At times I felt that I was the only one who believed he was dying.

But as painful as the experience can be, there’s a hopeful message. You will survive. You will emerge a stronger, if changed, person. You will appreciate things you never did before.

I can tell you this because I lived it. And I survived it.

Do you have questions for Lorraine? Let her know in the comments below or on Facebook. Lorraine also has a video on Life as a Mesothelioma Caregiver.

Get Access to Free Resources for Patients & Loved Ones
Free Mesothelioma Resources